ABC announced this morning that Kim Kardashian would compete on the upcoming season of Dancing with the Stars. Apparently, Kim was so excited she decided to walk on broken glass. (Ha ha! Gypsies.) After a quick trip to the ER, Kim called Good Morning America to say she’ll still be dancing thus allaying the fear [...] [...more]
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The new season of “Dancing With the Stars” may have already lost its first competitor — and they haven’t even announced the official cast yet. Kim Kardashian — who is scheduled to be on the show this season — badly cut her foot in her hotel room late Sunday night. We’re told she sliced her foot [...] [...more]
Sex sells, so it’s no surprise that, like Superhero Movie before it, Disaster Movie attempts to bring in viewers unaware of ways of procuring actual pornography (i.e., the internet) by promising a brief, cleavage-filled wrestling match. But what makes this clip astounding is how writer-director duo Friedberg and Seltzer are somehow able to make a [...] [...more]
Dear Mr. President, It is with the deepest regret that I must inform you of grave news: The terrorists have won. Attached is photographic evidence that is not for the weak at heart. (Now, would be a good time to eat a cookie and give the photos to Dick Cheney. Everyone likes a helper!) During this darkest [...] [...more]
Before adorning her ass, Kim Kardashian’s shorts once functioned as a table cloth for a family of 12, a hot air balloon cover and an old time revival tent. They would later go on to become the official plaid donor for not only the PGA tour, but the entire country of Scotland. True story. Photos: Flynet, [...] [...more]
Why do these pictures always look like they’re taken from miles away? And why never from behind? What are you trying to hide Kim Kardashian? What’s the big secret?! Oh, right: the ass. Gotcha. So, I guess I’m safe in assuming these shots of Kim in Mexico were taken from at least Jersey if not [...] [...more]
Kim Kardashian will apparently be a playable character in the upcoming boxing video game Facebreaker from EA Sports. I included footage of Kim’s character after the jump, and I’ve got to say I’m disappointed. For starters, they make it seem like Kim possesses any athletic skills whatsoever outside the realm of championship ice cream eating. [...] [...more]
I’m no physicist, but with the combined density of Kim Kardashian’s ass and breasts (which act as counterweights), how does she not have her own gravitational pull and/or break through the Earth’s crust with every step? Get me a room full of scientists writing equations on a chalkboard STAT. I want this conundrum solved post [...] [...more]
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